Henry's First Haircut

Henry got his first haircut yesterday. He did so well - just played in the seat and looked around. What a handsome little man. 

Only 6 days until he turns 1.

My little baby is growing up

My baby is almost one. ONE.

I've breastfed Henry since the day he was born. He's always been a pretty good little eater and my plan all along has been to wean him around his first birthday. Over the weekend, I dropped his afternoon feeding and began giving him a sippy cup of milk/breastmilk. He did great! 

I had been thinking about which feeding to drop next (he has about 5-6) and then, yesterday, he refused to nurse. I thought it was just a one time thing, but feeding after feeding yesterday, he rejected breastfeeding. I thought for sure he would at least nurse before bed, but no dice. And then he slept through the night without a peep and this morning, still no nursing! I don't know yet if it's because he's teething, sick, or just self-weaning. But from what I can tell, it looks like weaning. 

Either way, I've been looking forward to this day for months and yet here I am feeling so emotional about it. I foolishly thought that I'd be the one choosing when Henry and I ended breastfeeding and yet here I am once again being reminded that some things are just out of my control. My baby is growing up, developing into a real person with likes and dislikes and opinions and I can't force him to be what I want. I'm pretty sure I will be learning this lesson over and over for the rest of my life. Or at least until my children are well in to adulthood. 

I'm feeling all sad and angsty over this huge change in our relationship. I'm trying to look on the bright side and be thankful that I got to nurse him for the last 11 months and 19 days.

 Two week old Henry in a milk coma

And once I stop feeling sad, I will have lots to celebrate... Jon can get up with Henry at night! I can drink as much coffee as I want! I can wear a real bra again! I won't need to pump at work! I can drink when I want! My boobs will go back to a more reasonable size! I can leave the baby with someone else for more than 3 hours at a time! Basically, weaning = freedom. Also emotional turmoil and sadness, but then the sweet sweet freedom. I'm looking forward to that part. 

K 

Easter 2013

Henry's first Easter Basket

Henry with Grandma and Grandpa Kirk

9 Months

Henry turned 9 months old on the 1st of March. It's hard to believe he's getting so close to his first birthday.

He has changed so much in the last month! He's starting to scoot around (army crawling) and clapping all the time. He loves to stand up and is starting to walk along the edge of furniture. He still hasn't figured out how to pull himself up though, so he whines for help until we lift him up. He has six teeth (four top, two bottom), and his hair is starting to fill in. The bald patch on the back of his head is completely gone. He's eating a lot of different baby foods, and we've started grinding up our food and offering it to him. He had taco meat and lentils last night. Henry is still the happiest baby I've ever known. He laughs and smiles all the time. He loves to be tickled, and LOVES his daddy. He's sleeping really well, and is just generally an easy kiddo. Jon and I know how lucky we've been.

Henry is still breastfeeding, although his nursing sessions are getting shorter and shorter. He's nursing pretty regularly throughout the day, but I have a feeling he's going to be weaning himself sooner rather than later. He used to nurse anywhere from 10-20 minutes per side, and now he's down to 2-5 minutes a side on a good day. I'm trying not to cry about it and just enjoy however much time I have left to breastfeed him.

I still have plenty of baby weight left to lose (about 10 lbs), but I'm just trying to take it slow and enjoy the time I have with Henry. I know we'll be plenty active this summer and once I stop breastfeeding, I'll be able to restrict my calories a bit more to help lose the last few pounds. I can comfortably wear jeans again, so I'm happy enough for now.

Jon and I are taking a nice long vacation in June to visit with both sides of the family - Seaside with Jon's side and Sisters with mine. I can't wait for the beautiful weather and free babysitting :)

I'm sure I'll be back soon enough with new updates. Henry is growing so much every day and I am so blessed to be his mama.

K

Hair

Henry had a full head of hair when he was born. When he was about 3 months old, his hair began to thin and fall out, growing back as baby fuzz. However, a few of the original hairs stuck around - resulting in the worlds biggest baby combover.


I've been tempted to cut it for months, but Jon was resistant.

Today, I gave in and trimmed Henry's hair. I think it looks pretty good. No more baby combover!

Working Mama

I always thought I would be a working mom. Staying at home sounded boring, monotonous, unfulfilling. I didn't go to college and then graduate school just to spend my days sitting around the house with a baby.

And then I had a baby. And I tried to be on maternity leave. And I realized I have a serious problem: I am obsessed with work.

I want to be a rockstar at work, 100% of the time, and if I'm not kicking ass and taking names, I feel like I'm failing at my job. And I just can't do both... I can't rock at my job and rock at being a mom.

On days I'm at home with Henry, I obsessively check my email, work during his naps, and worry that I'm missing out on something Important. When I'm at work, I'm frustrated knowing Henry is being cared for by a stranger. He's missing out on being loved by his parents, he's getting bottles instead of breastfeeding, and he's not napping. Poor guy comes home exhausted and ends up asleep for the night by 5:30. Which means I'm rushing out of the office trying to make sure I get to see him before bed.

By no means is it an ideal situation. But I also realize how privileged I am. I only work 20 hours a week. We can afford for me to work 20 hours a week. I have a wonderful boss and supportive office. I love the work I am doing. And yet, I still feel as though something has to give. I don't want to spend the next 18 years doing the awkward work/stay home finding balance dance. I want to be there for Henry now and as he continues to grow and change and need me.

I am so lucky that I can choose between advancing in my career and being home with my child, but I hate feeling like I have to make a choice. I want to do both - but I know myself. I know that I can't just toe the line and live in both worlds. I want to be all in or all out, and I'm leaning towards being all out. I want to pour my energy into my family, and I want to figure out how to do it well, without the pull and strain of my work.

If only there were easy answers to the hard questions in life.

Teething

Henry is so close to getting his first tooth.

The tooth is sticking out already - just not all the way. It's on the bottom right side of his mouth, and so cute and tiny.

While all of the other milestones he has hit feel significant, teeth make me a little sad. Once the teeth are in, there's no going back and he's that much closer to growing up!

26

Today is my 26th birthday.

Now that I have a baby, my birthday doesn't get to be all about me. I'm home with Henry today, which means my birthday will consist of feedings, naps, diaper changes, and playing with my little man. I'm so thankful that I get to be home with Henry part-time, and just a little sad that the day won't be spent getting pampered and going out with friends.

Jon and I do have babysitting arranged for tonight (thanks J & H). So I am looking forward to having a nice dinner out. While most of the adjustments to motherhood have come easily, giving up birthday celebrations/traditions is a bit sad for me. I LOVE my birthday!

At least in a few years I will be getting cute Henry cards and macaroni necklaces :)

iPhone Photo Dump

This week my baby is going to be 5 months old. It's shocking how quickly time has flown by. I will try and do a 5 month post later this week. In the meantime, enjoy my iPhone photo dump.

Sleep

While I wouldn't say that Jon and I are officially sleep training, we have been reading this awesome book from a sleep researcher. The book is mostly about his studies and observations about how the baby brain works around sleep.

We started implementing some of his suggestions about a month ago and we have seen some drastic improvements in both Henry's moods throughout the day, and his sleep at night. Typically he is asleep by 8:00 and then wakes up sometime between 2:00am and 4:00am to eat, before going back for a couple hours (meaning if he eats at 2, sometimes he's up for the morning at 5 or earlier.)

The tips in the book are counterintuitive... Put the baby to sleep when he is quiet but alert, the earlier he goes to bed the longer he will sleep, the brain dictates sleep and the stomach dictates hunger, never wake a sleeping baby, etc.

After a month of major improvements in his sleep, Henry slept from 7:30pm-6:00am without a peep last night. I woke up at 5:45 wondering what happened to my baby! It felt wonderful to get a solid 8 hours of sleep. Hopefully we continue to make progress and Henry will keep sleeping like a champ.

He turns 4 months old on Monday, so expect another update soon.

3 Months!

Pregnancy Weight Gain (& Loss)

Confession time... I gained 59 lbs while I was pregnant with Henry.

My midwife encouraged me not to worry about it - and to try and remember that it was taking me 9 months to gain that weight, so it was reasonable to assume it will take me 9 months to lose it.

It's been 9 weeks and I'm down 39 lbs. I still have 20 lbs to go before I'm back to my pre-Henry weight. As frustrating as it has been to be stuck in yoga pants the last 9 weeks, I've been amazed at the transformation my body has made so quickly. 9 weeks ago I could barely sit up in bed or walk to the bathroom without help, 6 weeks ago I could barely walk a mile without pain and now I'm back at the gym and able to work out at a good pace! I'm starting to feel comfortable in my own skin and really, that's all I can ask for at this point. I know the weight will continue to come off, and one day my clothes will fit again :)

In the meantime, yoga pants and dresses it is!

5 Weeks

I can't believe my baby is already 5 weeks old! He is growing so much everyday.

Henry had his one month check-up on Monday. He's weighing in at 11 lbs 6 oz, and 24 inches long.

And yup, I'm still writing his birth story. Hopefully I will have it done before I go back to work in 3 weeks!

Week 40

Today is Henry's due date - and he is already 13 days old.

His bilirubin levels were down to 10.9 on Monday, so we were able to get him off lights. His check up yesterday had his levels at 10.1, so they are coming down slowly. We're supplementing breast milk with formula to try and help clear out his system and to keep him well hydrated.

As I write, I'm sitting in the waiting room at the doctors office. We finally decided to circumcise our baby - and we're doing the procedure today. I'm nervous, but hopefully everything will go well and he will heal like a champ.

Sleep is more or less non-existent. We have a strict feeding schedule (because of the jaundice) so I usually only have an hour to an hour and a half in between feedings. So far, the longest stretch of sleep I've had is two hours. Once we get the ok to stop the crazy feeding schedule, we will be able to let Henry sleep at night without waking him up to eat.

I'm so thankful that Jon was able to take two weeks off work to help out. There is no way I could do this on my own. Overall, we're figuring things out and enjoying cuddling our little baby. I'm on my own starting next week, so send good thoughts my way!

Jaundice Update (part 2)

Henry's levels came down to 12.1 today. The doctors let us remove the top lights from his bed, but we have to keep him on the light bed for one more night. Let's hope his levels drop down enough tomorrow that they're comfortable removing him completely.

His coloring is looking a lot better. His chest, head, and eyes are still really yellow - but the rest of his body has returned to a normal skin tone.

Jaundice Update

Henry's bilirubin levels are down to 13.8, which means we should be able to get him off the light bed tomorrow. I can't wait to be able to cuddle with my baby!

Henry's Birth Story, Part 1

Warning: I'm not going to gloss over all of the gross stuff. So read at your own risk.

My due date was June 14th. As soon as I hit the 37 week mark, I started hoping Henry would make his debut. Of course, I knew it was much more likely that he would arrive late - so I wasn't holding my breath. I just knew that I was huge, uncomfortable, and really ready to not be pregnant anymore. I was measuring a tiny bit ahead of schedule, but not by much. Plus, I was anxious to start maternity leave.

So... Last Thursday was a normal work day for me. I felt fine all day, just my usual pregnancy discomforts. I left work early for an appointment with my midwife. There were no indications that I would be having this baby anytime soon.

After my appointment, I ran errands. I stopped by Jiffy Lube, the daycare, and then I went and got a pedicure. When I got home, Jon was out running. That night, Jon and I made BBQ pizza for dinner and went to bed early since I hadn't been sleeping well because of my hips. We ended up sleeping in our guest room. I had hoped the firmer bed would help my hips feel better.

Around 2:00am I woke up to go to the bathroom for the 2nd or 3rd time that night. As I was crawling back into bed, my water broke. I wasn't sure if I had just wet my pants or if it was my water, but since I had just went pee, I figured it was amniotic fluid.

I rushed back into the bathroom to make sure I wasn't crazy. The water just kept coming out and I knew for sure at that point that it was really happening. I checked the water to make sure it was clear, put on a pad, put a towel in bed, and tried to fall back asleep.

Around 3:00am, I still hadn't fallen back to sleep, so I finally woke Jon to tell him what had happened. Once I convinced him that I wasn't about to give birth, seeing as how contractions still hadn't started, he insisted we read up on what happens when the bag of waters break. The books we grabbed all said the same thing... Contractions should start within a couple hours.

At that point, I convinced Jon to go back to bed. I wanted him to get as much sleep as possible, since I had no clue how long my labor would be. I went downstairs to send some emails and eat breakfast.

At 4:00am, my contractions started in full force. Right away the contractions were about 45 seconds long and 3-5 minutes apart. After about an hour of ignoring the contractions, I went and laid down in one of the labor positions Jon and I had practiced. Jon rubbed my back while I relaxed through each contraction. At 6:00am, I had Jon call the midwife. After only 2 hours of labor at home, I knew it was time to head to the birth center.

Week 39

Henry is 6 days old today. His jaundice has continued to get worse - so keep us in your prayers. I will update more soon.

 Here we are at week 39!

Henry Updates

I am still trying to find the time to sit down and write about Henry's birth. The last few days have been so crazy, I feel like I barely have time to eat, let alone sit down at a computer for more than 5 minutes.

Poor little guy has jaundice, so we are in the process of doing home phototherapy. Henry has to be on the light bed 24/7 except for feedings, so we are hardly able to hold our baby right now. It's heart wrenching, to say the least. We have a nurse coming over every morning to draw blood and check his levels... Once his levels drop below a certain amount, he'll be off the bed and hopefully home free. Until then, prayers are appreciated

Here's a picture of our baby on his therapy bed.

Baby Henry is Here

Henry Lando Hunt made his debut at 1:37pm on Friday, June 1st. He weighed in at 9lbs, 5.5oz and 21 inches long.

We're all doing well, just resting and recovering at home.

I'll write my birth story soon :) I can't wait to share how everything went.